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Levi Johnston and Hitler Weigh in on Sarah Palin Resigning

One of them doesn’t take it too well…

sarah-louise-heath-palin-2430Bristol Palin’s baby daddy Levi Johnston is talking about Sarah Palin’s decision to resign as governor of Alaska. Levi and the Palin family have had a not so friendly relationship ever since he and Bristol called off their sham of an engagement. I can’t imagine his statements here will do anything to ease that.

Johnston claims to have overheard Sarah talking about how she would like to cash in on her new found fame with all the offers coming in including a possible reality show and a book.

“She had talked about how nice it would be to take some of this money people had been offering us and you know just run with it, say ‘forget everything else,'” he said. Adding, “I think the big deal was the book. That was millions of dollars.”

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July 15, 2009 Posted by | Culture Critic, Doosh Watch 2009, Politiks | , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

Sarah Palin Resigned

For the Good of the People


Sarah Palin has decided to step down as the Governor of Alaska to save the state all the money it is spending on investigating her for ethics violations. She has also stated that she doesn’t want to be a “lame duck” and that “one term was enough”. Please watch this video while I go look for my soap box.

OK, I’m back.

Boy, where to start. As many of you know, I am extremely liberal. On most issues I’m so far to the left that I start to wrap back around. I’m so far left when I stick my head out my door I can see Rush Limbaugh’s house. Right now he is relaxing by his pool, popping drugs by the handful and sporting a Speedo, it’s not a pretty sight. Oh wait, I’m sorry. Rush isn’t popping drugs, he’s taking his “prescription”.

Back to Sarah. Lets talk about “One term being enough”. She was elected in 2006. Took office in January of 2007. She spent around four months running for Vice President. And now has retired with a year and a half to go on her term. Maybe my math is off, but in the two and a half years as Governor of Alaska she was only really there for about two years worth of work. I know some people will say while she was running for V.P. she was still doing her work as Governor and that is kind of true. Let’s be honest, in those months she was running for V.P. all of her attention was focused on winning and getting the hell out of Alaska. How can she claim one term was enough when she BARELY completed HALF of her first term as Governor?

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July 8, 2009 Posted by | Culture Critic, Doosh Watch 2009, Politiks, The Wrath of Kahn | , , , , , | 10 Comments

North Korea Keeps Kicking Up Dust

Or Whatever You Kick Up in North Koreakim

Kim Jong Il’s pants must be riding high lately because he has been making all kinds of threats. He’s getting ready to turn over power to his, son but he wants to fill the world with fear before he leaves. I can’t help but wonder if this is some sort of revenge for Team America World Police. All joking aside, these are scary times we live in. Any time someone threatens to rain nuclear fire on the heads of others you should keep a close eye on them. A logical person knows that dropping a nuclear weapon would more than likely end up with more being dropped, which in turn will kill everyone on the planet. Some people don’t care about these things because some people are just plain crazy. I really do hope Obama and the U.N. can do something to defuse this situation; we do not need another war.

June 25, 2009 Posted by | Politiks | , , , | 2 Comments

Joan Walsh Took on Bill O’Reilly

She stays calm, he stays crazyts-o_reilly_factor

Abortion is a tricky subject.  Personally, I’m pro-choice, but after 15 years of arguing about it, I’ve resigned myself to avoid the abortion debate.  It is a sensitive issue.  For a lot of people, it’s a religious issue.  For others, a feminist issues.

Nonetheless, I think we can all agree that tossing around terms like “baby killer” or “abortion mill” do nothing but inflame an already inflammatory issue the discussion or try to reach a common solution about the abortion debate.  It’s inflammatory an unnecessary rhetoric.  Furthermore, it is rhetoric that, TMIMO, lead, in some way, to the murder of Dr. George Tiller.

It doesn’t matter whether you think late term abortion is wrong (always or only in some cases), or whether the legal facility which Tiller operated was a moral abomination. (I say “legal,” fully understanding that the legality of an activity doesn’t make it “right,” whatever “right” means to you.)  The point is that vigilante justice is no justice at all.  Justice should be sought from one’s government and legislators.

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June 16, 2009 Posted by | Culture Critic, Doosh Watch 2009, News You May or May Not Use, Politiks | , , , , , , , , , , | 33 Comments

Arrrrgh You Kidding Me?

Swedish Pirate Party, FTW!


So big news from Sweden this week.  The Swedish Pirate Party, a party that wasn’t even in existence the last time European elections were held, secured 7% of the national vote in Sweden this week, enough to garner the party a seat in Parliament.

Swedish Pirates in Parliament, y’all!

Now before you go thinking these pirates are going to take to the high seas, and start stealing your IKEA furniture, just calm down.  The Swedish Pirate Party is more interested in online copyright issues, internet transparency, and opposing the enforcement of “the EU’s intellectual property (IP) enforcement directive, which demands that internet service ­providers turn over traffic data to copyright holders who are trying to track down filesharers.”

You know.  Napster and shit.

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June 11, 2009 Posted by | News You May or May Not Use, Politiks, Wistful Lists | , , , , , | 14 Comments

Angry Black Lady Chronicles

I Love my iPhone More than My Principles

ts-feminismAs y’all well know by now, Angry Black Lady is a communist pinko social librul terrorist sympathizer.  She likes hanging out with Puerto Mexicans, (wouldn’t mind if we put one on the Supreme Court), and she thinks Obama is, more or less, the bee’s messiah.

Most of my views, as I relayed in a recent installment of Angry Black Lady Chronicles, stem from my upbringing, including my mom who saw her parents struggle to put food on the table in the 1950s after Joe McCarthy and his band of fuckwits, decided that my grandpa was a Commie and was no longer fit to serve as a teacher in the Philadelphia School District.  So yeah.  I relish sticking it to “the man,” whomever “the man” happens to be at any given time.

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June 9, 2009 Posted by | Angry Black Lady Chronicles, Culture Critic | , , , , , , , | 13 Comments


A Spurting Geyser of Crazy


Michele Bachmann.  She was crazy last week and she’s still crazy.  This time, she went all porno on our asses during her speech to a bunch of Minnesotans on “Annual Tax Freedom Day.”

After calling the man who introduced her a “hot hunk of a man,” she claims that Minnesota was “doing tea parties before tea parties were cool.”  Um, no Michele.  I’m pretty sure it’s Brits: ∞ + 1; Minnesota: 0 when it comes to tea parties.  And as far as United States-related tea parties, I’m fairly certain Boston gets the win, not Minnesota. It’s just history, baby.

After Michele crazy talks for a while, some dumbass from the crowd yells at her “Michele, you’re a hottie!”  Michele brushes that comment off with a “I’ve got my husband right up here; don’t make a move,” but then takes the cue from the randy crowd and talked dirty to them:

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May 12, 2009 Posted by | Culture Critic, Doosh Watch 2009, Politiks | , , , , , | 11 Comments

Doosh Watch 2009: Red Alert

Michele Bachmann is batshit crazy.ts-michele-bachmann

Put on your tin foil hats, folks.  The hat will serve two purposes.  First, it will make clean up easier when your head EXPLODES. Your roommate and/or loved ones will be traumatized when they discover you after your head explosion; don’t make them clean your brains off the wall.  Second, the tin foil hat will prevent the CRAZY from infiltrating your brain and taking over; your mind is a terrible thing to waste.

Everyone ready?

Michele Bachmann, the Republican Congresswoman for the 6th District in Minnesota is out of her goddamn mind.  Last week, she said the following:

“I find it interesting that it was back in the 1970s that the swine flu broke out then under another Democrat president Jimmy Carter. And I’m not blaming this on President Obama, I just think it’s an interesting coincidence.”

Sure, Michele.  You’re not saying that.  Except for the fact that you just did. Oh and also?  It might behoove you to get your facts straight when you’re spewing ridiculous nonsense.  The last swine flu outreak was in 1976, under President Gerald Ford, who was–say it with me–A REPUBLICAN.

How do these people get elected?  It’s mind bottling.  (You know, when things are so crazy it gets your thoughts all trapped, like in a bottle?)

May 4, 2009 Posted by | Culture Critic, Doosh Watch 2009, Politiks | , , , , | 18 Comments

They Took Our Jerbs!

And now they’re infecting us with Pig AIDS!


After I watched the Summer Olympics opening ceremony, I was certain that the Chinese were going to take over the world which, when you think about it, wouldn’t necessarily be a bad thing.  It probably would mean that soup dumplings would be available on every street corner.  And who doesn’t love a delicious soup dumpling?  No one, that’s who.

But now, Fox News and its ilk are trying to convince me that it’s Mexicans who are the evil geniuses.  First, they come over here and take our jerbs.  Next, they pour a bunch of drugs over the border to get us all hooked in order to pacify us so the jerb-takers can do their… er… jerbs.

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May 4, 2009 Posted by | Culture Critic, Doosh Watch 2009, Politiks | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 7 Comments

The GOP Wants You!

To Get Swine Flu!


Remember back in March, the GOP trotted out animatronic wonder, Bobby Jindal to give the Republican response to Obama’s address to Congress?  Remember how he mocked the President’s stimulus package because there was a $140 million appropriation for volcano monitoring, even though at that very moment, Mount Redoubt in Alaska was considering blowing her top (Alaska’s natural response to growing threat of Sarah Palinism)?

Well, the Republicans done fucked up again, by stripping the nearly $900 million in pandemic preparedness from Obama’s stimulus package.

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April 27, 2009 Posted by | Culture Critic, Politiks | , , , , , , , , , , , | 8 Comments