uncollectedminds

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Today is She Who Shall Not Be Named Day

Be Strong

Today is August 4th, a day without you know who. I’m here to offer you someone else to Google. If staring at her own boobs is good enough for Jessica Alba, then it’s damn well good enough for you too.


You’re welcome.

So help me, if you do seek out she who shall not be named today, this is your Danny Bonaduce punishment. (Not safe for work!)

Do yourself a favor and don’t look. Once it is seen it can never be unseen, kind of like a Pauly Shore movie.


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August 4, 2009 - Posted by | Celebrity Shenanigans | , ,

16 Comments »

  1. Can I just stare at my own boobs? Please, and thank you?

    Comment by ellisbell | August 4, 2009 | Reply

  2. I could stare at her well-manicured backyard all day!

    Comment by drgnsldr | August 4, 2009 | Reply

  3. Drdnsldr: I don’t get that, in general. Like, it doesn’t look any different after five minutes. It’s not suddenly going to make itself available to you. What it the appeal of doing a long stare down?

    I think I’d just get bored. Or hungry. Or…something.

    Comment by TheHobo | August 4, 2009 | Reply

  4. Oh god, i looked. Why is his ball sack so huge? and what’s with the little tuft of orange hair above his minute weiner? What is he doing and why is he doing it in the buff?

    Comment by Mae | August 4, 2009 | Reply

  5. Dammit, Mae. Your comment made ME go look. And now I have all the same questions, plus this one – and I am vomiting in my mouth as I type this – is that an erection?

    Comment by Sarah | August 4, 2009 | Reply

  6. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My EYES..I’m going to have to sue over this. I’m going to crawl in a dark space and I’m bringing many xanax with me.

    Comment by cookiebees | August 4, 2009 | Reply

  7. If I had breasts, I would stay at home and play with them all day.

    Comment by WhoMee | August 4, 2009 | Reply

  8. i thank my lucky stars every day that i’m not a guy. i mean, sure, we bleed once a month for about 50 years, but at least we’re not struck dumb every time we see a pair of boobs walk by. (on their own two feet?)

    strike that.

    i’m glad i’m not a STRAIGHT guy.

    Comment by DonnaMartin | August 4, 2009 | Reply

  9. oh god. WHY DID I DO THAT. I KNEW IT WAS COMING. I’VE SEEN IT BEFORE.

    AAAHHHHHHH

    Comment by DonnaMartin | August 4, 2009 | Reply

  10. You guys are crazy. I wouldn’t click on that link if you paid me. Well, maybe if you paid me but it would have to be alot.

    Comment by Deimos | August 4, 2009 | Reply

  11. I have a vague memory of having looked once before, but I think my brain is protecting me from the memory of it. Thank you brain. I owe you one.

    Comment by oneofthevoicesinmyhead | August 4, 2009 | Reply

  12. yeah, all men think if they had breasts they would play with them all day.

    As a woman, I gotta say, they only get action (from me)at certain times. Otherwise, I’m just moving them out of my way, putting them back in my bra properly (really need new bras)and yanking up my shirts to a more modest level. And bras hurt. And going without bras can also hurt.

    I should mention I have inconveniently large breasts that, because they are not silicone, often try to meander in different directions sometimes (though mostly down). Also, if I go running without a bra, I can give myself a fat lip.

    And don’t even get me started on wandering nipples…

    Comment by TheHobo | August 4, 2009 | Reply

  13. Haha!

    I was about to say, Donna.

    And Sarah, I swear that it was YOU who made me look at Danny’s schlama-rama-ding-dong as punishment for something. I don’t even have to click because it is etched into my mind.

    Comment by ManBearPig | August 4, 2009 | Reply

  14. I READ YOUR COMMENTS AND I ***STILL*** LOOKED!!!! WHY?? WHY DID I GENTLY CARESSING LOOK????

    But I still don’t know what 2 girls, 1 cup is. And for that, I’m so grateful.

    DON’T ANY OF YOU MOTHER GENTLY CARESSERS TELL ME, EITHER!!

    Comment by SeaKat | August 4, 2009 | Reply

  15. AHAHAHAHAHAH! I DID make you do that, MBP! I can’t remember why, now, but you must have done something REALLY bad. Whatever it was I ABSOLVE YOU OF IT. In fact, I should turn myself in, or something. NO ONE, espesh you, should have to pay that kind of price. EVAR. FOR ANYTHING.

    Comment by Sarah | August 4, 2009 | Reply

  16. I am sitting here laughing at this thread…it is so gently caressing priceless.

    Comment by rumoUr | August 6, 2009 | Reply


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