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Marilyn Manson’s Satanic Knickers are in a Twist

When did Marilyn start looking like a menopausal Dr. Frank-N-Furter?

marilyn manson 290509Emo Spice is on the warpath after Travis Keller from LA Weekly suggested in an interview write-up that Marilyn is a paranoid cocaine addict who is nothing like his on stage goth persona. That didn’t sit well with the Manson, so he did what any emo dark lord would do–he bitched about it on his MySpace page.

“If one more ‘journalist’ makes a cavalier statement about me and my band, I will personally or with my fans’ help, greet them at their home and discover just how much they believe in their freedom of speech,” Manson warns. “I dare you all to write one more thing that you won’t say to my face. Because I will make you say it. In that manner. That is a threat.”

Do people still use MySpace? Isn’t that so early twenty-first century? Come on Marilyn, get with the program. No one is going to take your threats seriously unless you tweet them.

Oh yeah, one more thing. There’s no crying in baseball, I mean Rock and Roll! Suck it up and act like a real rock star.  Do you think Keith Richards cries like a little bitch when someone hurts his feelings? You know what Keith does? He snorts some of his father’s ashes, nails a dozen 18 year old groupies AND their mothers, then goes to sleep in his bed made out of money. Why don’t you try growing a pair, Marilyn. Oh, and another thing.  Alice Cooper called. He wants to know if you are done ripping off his 1970s stage persona yet. Why don’t you go back to doing 1980s cover song? I bet Limahl from Kajagoogoo would love to work with you.

Hey Marilyn, Frankie says Relax.


July 30, 2009 - Posted by | Celebrity Shenanigans, News You May or May Not Use | , ,


  1. This seems dangerous to me. He’s asking his fans to incite violence to make reporters take back what they’d said about their beloved dark lord. If this were a Law & Order episode, Jack McCoy would prosecute his ass.

    Comment by Chelsea - PETA Protector | July 30, 2009 | Reply

  2. I really enjoy watching the graceful aging process of this idiot.

    Comment by blah | July 30, 2009 | Reply

  3. So…is he or is he not Paul from the Wonder Years growed up?

    Comment by TheHobo | July 30, 2009 | Reply

  4. He looks like Uncle Fester and acts like an angst ridden teenager. Neither of which are attractive on a middle aged man.
    These cavalier remarks are going to get us into trouble. I hope he doesn’t come after the Hags and Squeers. If I look out my window and see Marilyn Manson with Kate Gosselin, I will be certain that we are at the end of days and the Mayans were probably right.

    Comment by bedbugs and ballyhoo | July 30, 2009 | Reply

  5. BandB: I think that would mean we were humanity’s last line of defense, and in that case I say we break out the scotch, fry up some bacon, grab a few trucks full of bricks and head to Applebees.

    If I’m going out, I’m going out drunk, fat, and gleefully angry.

    Comment by TheHobo | July 30, 2009 | Reply

  6. There’s nothing cool about a middle-aged man with a widening belly, face paint sporting a black cloak. We have a term for those guys and they are called D&D Masters.

    Comment by blah | July 30, 2009 | Reply

  7. “Lol” to blah and thehobo!

    Comment by DonnaMartin | July 30, 2009 | Reply

  8. BBB said, “These cavalier remarks are going to get us into trouble. I hope he doesn’t come after the Hags and Squeers.“

    It may have already begun BBB. Yesterday, I saw a truck with a licence plate that said Satan.

    Comment by rumoUr | August 1, 2009 | Reply

  9. Wait just a gol-danged second. I think we’re overlooking the most SHOCKING and INSANE part of this whole thing.

    Marilyn Manson still has FANS???!!!????

    Comment by SeaKat | August 1, 2009 | Reply

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