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Sutherland Lives To Headbutt Another Day

Christmas Trees Shake With Feardrunk

Well ok, he wasn’t going to die, but there is some good news for Kiefer Sutherland. Do you remember back in May when he headbutted a sucker for disrespecting Brooke Shields? It seems the D.A. thought it was a petty matter and threw that case out the window. There’s a lesson in this: headbutting is a petty thing. I wish I would have known this sooner because there have been a few people I wanted to headbutt in the past. I would’ve just walked up and introduced my head to their face and then skipped away without fear of consequence. Of course, I’m not famous so headbutting would probably have had a different outcome for me. Screw it, I’ll just keep throwing bricks at faces in the Applebee’s parking lot. Brick throwing is less painful for me anyway.


July 22, 2009 - Posted by | Celebrity Shenanigans | , , ,


  1. Why is he masturbating under a table at a restaurant? Or is he peeing…or is the anser C?

    Comment by oneofthevoicesinmyhead | July 22, 2009 | Reply

  2. I’m so proud that he’s Canadian. Brings a tear to my eye.

    Comment by rumoUr | July 22, 2009 | Reply

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