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As between being a Garish Liar or a Drunkass…

Always go with “drunkass”ts-starface1

Remember that dumbass eighteen-year-old girl, Kimberley Vlaminck who went into a tattoo parlor and asked for three stars under her left eye, but ended up with 56 stars all over her damn face?

And remember how she claimed she told the tattoo artist in French and English (the tattoo artist didn’t speak either language) that she wanted  only three stars, then fell asleep, and was shocked when she awoke to “this nightmare”–she looked in the mirror and saw that there were 56 stars all over her face?

How utterly horrified she was, calling the tattoos–“the graffiti that has ruined my life.”  “It is terrible for me,” she cried. “I cannot go out on to the street, I am so embarrassed. I just look horrible.”  A Belgian psychologist agreed: “The trauma this girl must be feeling is indescribable. She feels like a circus freak– and no wonder, because she looks like one.”


Whelp, turns out she is a liar whose pants have set themselves ablaze.

Kimberley confessed that she did not, as previously claimed, fall asleep at the tattoo shop, and said that she lied because her father was pissed off when he saw her face:

“Miss Vlaminck told a Dutch TV crew: ‘I asked for 56 stars and initially adored them. But when my father saw them, he was furious. So I said I fell asleep and that the tattooist had made a mistake.'”

So instead of being some drunk fool who wasn’t thinking straight, she is a lying sack who has revolting taste in tattoos, and is also, from the evidence thus gathered, a fucking idiot.  Kindly put her on the list of Persons to Be Removed From the Gene Pool.

Thank you.



June 24, 2009 - Posted by | Criminally Stupid, Doosh Watch 2009, News You May or May Not Use | , , , , ,


  1. hm, it sucks she doesn’t even have drunk as an excuse. not that it’d be that much better.

    Comment by AdmittedlyAddicted | June 24, 2009 | Reply

  2. What a jackass, especially since the tattoo artist felt so bad that he offered to help pay for the tattoo removal. He was creepy looking, but apparently not an asshole.

    Comment by blah | June 24, 2009 | Reply

  3. My question is who the fuck asks for exactly 56 stars?

    Comment by silent noodles | June 24, 2009 | Reply

  4. I think those tattoos took care of the “removing from the gene pool” issue for us.

    Ahhh, who am I kidding. It would take more than that to scare off a frat boy… 😛

    Comment by SeaKat | June 24, 2009 | Reply

  5. SeaKat: they are the ones who invented “Butherface” terminology. I think.

    Comment by TheHobo | June 24, 2009 | Reply

  6. silent noodles: she wanted to commemorate her IQ score…one star for each point.

    Comment by AdmittedlyAddicted | June 24, 2009 | Reply

  7. hhahahahahaa @ Hobo & AdAd

    Comment by SeaKat | June 24, 2009 | Reply

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