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Happy Towel Day

Do you know where your towel is?

douglasadams_douglasadams_comFor those in the U.S. it’s Memorial Day, true, but a holiday with a broader scope is upon us.  It’s Towel Day, an annual, global celebration of the life and works of the late author Douglas Adams. Why a towel? Because, in the Hitchhiker’s universe a towel is not only a versatile tool that proves handy in a variety of situations, it’s also a powerful psychological symbol and metaphor. To “know where one’s towel is” means to be in control of one’s own life.  It is the most important item a hitchhiker can have .  The author explains it far better.

From the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy:

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May 25, 2009 Posted by | Daily Whims | , , , | 10 Comments

Afternoon Awesome

Canada, Represent!

Canadian 17-year-old, Julia Dales, won the Beatbox Battle Wild Card Competition.

Here she is, and she’s pretty damn amazing:

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May 25, 2009 Posted by | Afternoon Awesome | , , , , | 3 Comments

Afternoon Squee!

Austin Kitty Limits


Special thanks to Mr. (#1) for taking such an awesome photo, and to Lisa (#1) for passing it along.

May 25, 2009 Posted by | Afternoon Squee! | , , , , , | 5 Comments

Monday’s Music

Memorial Day Edition

We here at Thundersquee! are unabashed fans of our military (though not always a fan of what they are asked to do). This Memorial Day get pumped up, send a package, and thank a veteran. Next stop, Danger Zone!

Don’t ask, don’t tell, after the jump!

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May 25, 2009 Posted by | Monday\'s Music | , , | Leave a comment

Attention Menfolk!

Your Penises Are NOT Playthingsts-penis-puppet

OK, sometimes they are, but for the love of Cruise, don’t use your penis as a puppet.  If you do, you could end up in jail where it won’t be only YOU using your penis as a plaything, ifyouknowwhatImeanandIthinkyoudo.

A 44-year-old man in Washington came up with some cockeyed scheme to have his johnson star in a puppet troupe. (Members only!)  Acccording to Seattlepi.com:

The police report of the incident said Timothy Wayne Martin, 44, of Auburn, Wash., was arrested after residents of the Arcadia Apartment Complex in Federal Way called police at about 10:30 a.m. May 13 and reported a man standing over an air conditioner intake wearing only an unbuttoned flannel shirt and “was apparently manipulating” his penis with a string “like a puppet.”

When he was arrested, Martin still had the string attached to his schlong.  Despite presumable attempts to provide some cockamamie reason for his antics, Martin was arrested and charged under the state’s felony indecent exposure statute.  Apparently, this wasn’t Martin’s first pervy penile puppet performance.

What a tool.


May 25, 2009 Posted by | Criminally Stupid, News You May or May Not Use | , , | 5 Comments


Life in 5,7,5

We at Thundersquee! can’t help but be indignant at the inequities of the poetic form when it comes to expressing the more low brow moments in life. So, to help even the field we offer you Lowku. The game and aim are simple. Twice a week we’ll display an image of one of life’s more “WTF?” moments, and your mission is to carefully select words that add up to 17 syllables and string them together in 5,7,5 form in order to describe said image or tell its story. Each Monday and Wednesday the winners of the previous challenge will be announced and a new image will be posted to ignite the next round of genius.

The last round’s winners and a new image, after the jump:

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May 25, 2009 Posted by | Lowku | , , , | 13 Comments

Leave Footloose Alone!!!

Chasing Bacon

footlooseEver since I heard they were remaking this movie full of greatness, I’ve been sad, but then I forgot all about it and thought Hollywood had, too. But, it seems my celebrations were too early. Chace Crawford, who’s too pretty for words, shall be the new Kevin Bacon. Originally Zac Ephron was cast but dropped out and they just substituted Zac Ephron part deaux in the role. I had trouble telling them apart. Next up they can do the male version of The Patty Duke Show. I’ll let them dance fight over who gets to be on top.

Chace Crawford, you hear me now. You are no Kevin Bacon, SIR! Do you think that you can dance angry in a warehouse drinking beer and mentally envisioning a montage like Mr. Bacon? You think you can do knee slides, spins, and high kicks with his tenacity? I highly doubt it, small fry. He was the male Jennifer Beals of his time. No other guy from the 80’s can say that.

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May 25, 2009 Posted by | Daily Whims, Movie Marquis | , , , , | 5 Comments

Best in Squee!

ts_big_fistWe here at Thundersquee! love our commenters. We love them so much that we’d sneak out to the parking lot behind the bleachers and make out with them in the back seat of their bitchin’ Camaro. But Thundersquee! is classy, so there will be no heavy petting. Instead, Thundersquee! will highlight the most squee!-worthy comments in a weekly column aptly titled Best in Squee!

And the award goes to…

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May 25, 2009 Posted by | Best in Squee! | , , | 3 Comments


Cooking with Bullshit Edition

In this week’s GOOP, Gwyneth Paltrow decides to share some recipes with us. These recipes aren’t just any recipes, though. They belong to Pablo, the chef of her friend Giancarlo Giametti, or “GG” as he’s affectionately known. GG is described as an “Italian gentleman… longtime friend and partner of fashion legend Valentino Garavani.” Apparently having a chef isn’t GG’s only extravagance. Gwyneth claims that he lives in exceptional style, the likes of which she has never seen. I’m picturing butlers, Rolls Royces, gold toilets and expensive lavender moisturizers.

These recipes had better be good.


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May 25, 2009 Posted by | GOOPing | , , | Leave a comment

Killa Bees, We’re on a Swarm!

That’s a Wu-Tang Reference for All You White Folks


So here’s the buzz in New York City: Some crazy ass bees decided they needed to play them some video games and swarmed in front of a GameStop in New York City.

The desperate workers inside, who could be seen on the phone looking bewildered by the swarm, put a sign in the window:

“Look! … closed due to bee infestation.”

Most passers-by ignored the sign in the GameStop window on account of the eleventy million bees swarming outside, but one Bee Whisperer helped. Dressed in regular clothing, he was able to trap some of the bees in a box.

ABC7, apparently, called the police for help.  The po-po told them to call the fire department.  The fire department, presumably after informing ABC7 that its animal rescue efforts extend only to cats in trees, told them to call 911.   911, which is always a joke in your town, told them to call 311.  311, after presumably singing “whoa-oh!  Honey is the color of your energy,” told them to call Mayor Bloomberg.  Mayor Bloomberg probably was all, “buzz off!  I’m taking my daily money bath.”

Finally, the NYPD sent their bee expert (who was likely on staff in case the turror-ists ever decide to use African killer bees to hate our freedoms) to lure the bees away using the scent of a queen bee.

Who knew L’il Kim was so stinky.


May 25, 2009 Posted by | News You May or May Not Use | , , , | Leave a comment