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10 Film Titles that Sound Like Porn

With thanks to Orson Welles

Not Porn, but this promotional image isn't helping.

Not Porn?

While researching something about Orson Welles recently, I happened across a movie title that sent me into a little giggle fit and made me realize how porn like so many movie titles seem if you remove their context–or add a different one. Once my inner 12 year old has broken free she’s hard to reel back  in, so instead of fighting her (She’d just give me an eye roll and some dramatic sass anyway),  I decided to give her something productive to do.  So here are the 10 movie titles I think most sound like they should be porn.

10. The Talented Mr. Ripley

9. Some Like it Hot

8. The Dirty Dozen

7. The Last Boy Scout

6. Girl Interrupted

5. Splendor in the Grass

4. The 400 Blows

3. Deep Impact

2. The Midnight Meat Train

1. Too Much Johnson (The movie title that started it all.)

Share yours in the comments.

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May 19, 2009 - Posted by | Wistful Lists | , , , ,

200 Comments »

  1. 1. Big

    2. Leave It To Beaver

    Comment by queencrone | May 19, 2009 | Reply

  2. 3. Bend It like Beckham

    Comment by baby fish mouth | May 19, 2009 | Reply

  3. Free Willy

    Comment by cooter jean | May 19, 2009 | Reply

  4. Herbie fully loaded

    (am I remembering that correctly?)

    Comment by cooter jean | May 19, 2009 | Reply

  5. 6. Goldfinger

    Comment by WhoMee | May 19, 2009 | Reply

  6. 7. Octopussy

    What’s up, Bond?

    Comment by vodkafanta | May 19, 2009 | Reply

  7. You guess “Octopussy” is what they were going to call the porno with the octomom?

    Comment by cooter jean | May 19, 2009 | Reply

  8. 8. The Last Temptation of Christ

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 19, 2009 | Reply

  9. 9. Diff’rent Strokes

    Comment by queencrone | May 19, 2009 | Reply

  10. 10. Ain’t Misbehavin’

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 19, 2009 | Reply

  11. 11. Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets

    Comment by queencrone | May 19, 2009 | Reply

  12. 12. The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers

    (starring Elijah Wood)

    Comment by queencrone | May 19, 2009 | Reply

  13. Here’s one I saw this weekend:

    13. Holes

    Comment by queencrone | May 19, 2009 | Reply

  14. 14. Frost/Nixon

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 19, 2009 | Reply

  15. 15. Lethal Weapon

    16. Lethal Weapon 2

    17. Lethal Weapon 3

    18. Lethal Weapon 4

    Comment by DonnaMartin | May 19, 2009 | Reply

  16. 19. Stand and Deliver

    (i’m pretty sure i’m going to be doing this all night.)

    Comment by DonnaMartin | May 19, 2009 | Reply

  17. 20. All the King’s Men

    Comment by DonnaMartin | May 19, 2009 | Reply

  18. Late additions:

    12 Angry Men

    Snatch

    Toy Story

    Bring It On

    Dirty Harry

    Spaceballs

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 20, 2009 | Reply

  19. The Good, the Bad and the Ugly

    The Cook, The Thief, his Wife and her Lover.

    Comment by rl | May 20, 2009 | Reply

  20. Seed

    Crimson Tide (menstruation porn exists, trust me, don’t look)

    Comment by rl | May 20, 2009 | Reply

  21. 31. The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants

    Comment by queencrone | May 21, 2009 | Reply

  22. Now that Lily mentions it, I think Snatch should be number one. I mean really. Snatch? There is no other movie title like that.

    Comment by baby fish mouth | May 21, 2009 | Reply

  23. Three men and a baby (…sorry I couldn’t resist)

    Comment by sh | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  24. bfm : DICK.

    Comment by SeaKat | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  25. HA! at rl with the cook the thief the wife, his lover, and a litter of dalmatians.

    Comment by DonnaMartin | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  26. seakat, well i NEVER!

    🙂

    Comment by DonnaMartin | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  27. Bird

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  28. Sophie’s Choice

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  29. Taken

    My Bloody Valentine

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  30. DonnaMartin: that’s not what it said on the bathroom wall!!

    Comment by SeaKat | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  31. Swingers

    Comment by shu_shu | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  32. oh yeah? well your mother was a hamster and your father smelled of elderberries!!!!111

    Comment by DonnaMartin | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  33. 39. Splash

    Comment by DonnaMartin | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  34. Fists of Fury

    (Yeah, I went there…)

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  35. Shaft

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  36. Snatch and Shaft could be a double feature, IYKWIMAITYD

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  37. Above the Rim.

    I didn’t think it was possible to make yourself spit drink, but that thought just sprang itself on me.

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  38. A Few Good men.

    Crap, I just had another one and now I can’t remember what it was.

    Oh yeah, Adventures in Babysitting

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  39. Wait, has no one said “Blow”?

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  40. ha!

    46. Band of Brothers

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  41. 47. balls of fury
    48. into the deep

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  42. 49. porky’s
    50. porky’s II: the next day
    51. porky’s: the revenge

    boo ya!

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  43. Blonde Ambition

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  44. 53. man on fire

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  45. Balls of Fury. Brilliant!

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  46. 54. the iceman cometh

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  47. Fun with Dick and Jane

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  48. 56. stick it

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  49. 57. fast and furious

    (somebody please make me stop)

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  50. Oo OOo Wet, Hot American Summer

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  51. tin cup

    hahahahahaha

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  52. Beach Blanket Bingo

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  53. The Whackness

    I doubt it will be me that stops you!

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  54. das boot

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  55. grease

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  56. Truly, Madly, Deeply

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  57. Everything You’ve Always Wanted to Know About Sex, But Were Afraid to Ask

    shazam!!

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  58. Orgasmo

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  59. Breast Men

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  60. Riding in Cars with Boys

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  61. Boys on the Side

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  62. Good!

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  63. Boyz N the Hood

    (complete with porn-y spelling!)

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  64. Woman on Top

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  65. You see what you made me do there…

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  66. Enter the Dragon

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  67. Pecker

    (Since we have shaft and Dick)

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  68. teehee

    Mount Rushmore

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  69. Charlie and the Chocolate Factory

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  70. The Harder They Come

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  71. Coming to America

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  72. Wait did you say “Das Boot” because submarines are full of seamen?

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  73. Nuts

    Chocolat

    Awakenings

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  74. Tie Me Up! Tie Me Down!

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  75. Pearl Harbor

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  76. what did you just do to ‘charlie and the chocolate factory’… you have reached traumatizing levels. ka-doos to you.

    Comment by baby fish mouth | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  77. the lion the witch and the wardrobe?

    Comment by baby fish mouth | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  78. don’t be a menace to south central while drinking your juice in the hood

    (i don’t even want to think about how perverted that could actually be if you break it down)

    Comment by baby fish mouth | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  79. Bob & Carol & Ted & Alice

    Comment by shu_shu | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  80. Tunnel of Love

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  81. kiss kiss bang bang

    Comment by baby fish mouth | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  82. bfm: Like it wasn’t glaringly obvious Willy Wonka is a backdoor man!

    Wait, is Backdoor Man a movie?

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  83. In & Out

    Comment by shu_shu | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  84. Chitty chitty bang bang

    Comment by shu_shu | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  85. The Wiz

    Comment by baby fish mouth | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  86. Horatio Hornblower

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  87. Scream

    Comment by baby fish mouth | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  88. Easy Rider

    Comment by shu_shu | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  89. Up

    Sorry, Pixar…)

    Comment by shu_shu | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  90. The Naked Gun

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  91. Bones (That Snoop Dogg movie …I had to check IMDB to make sure I hadn’t imagined this one!)

    Comment by SeaKat | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  92. A League of Their Own

    Comment by SeaKat | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  93. It Happened One Night

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  94. The Man with the Golden Gun

    Yeah, what’s up with that, Bond?

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  95. nice, stm

    The Harder They Come

    Comment by baby fish mouth | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  96. Toy Story

    Comment by SeaKat | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  97. My Friend Flicka

    Comment by shu_shu | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  98. The Little Spermmaid

    (I know, it’s not following the rules. Made me laugh too much not to post it. Sorry!)

    Comment by SeaKat | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  99. I’m Gonna Git You Sucka

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  100. And I imdb’d it…Backdoor Man is, indeed a (non-porno) movie.

    Comment by shu_shu | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  101. hahahah my friend flicka!

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  102. Strictly Ballroom

    Comment by SeaKat | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  103. The Black Stallion

    Comment by SeaKat | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  104. Little Women

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  105. LOL, LTP!

    Dirty Dancing

    Comment by SeaKat | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  106. Truly, Madly, Deeply

    (Was that already on here?)

    Sex, Lies and Videotape

    Comment by SeaKat | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  107. i grew up thinking dirty dancing was actually a dirty movie. when i saw it i was definitely surprised… and i stopped thinking everyone i knew from school was an unashamed pervert for loving it.

    Comment by baby fish mouth | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  108. What Women Want

    (Hint: Not Mel Gibson)

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  109. Romancing the Stone

    Comment by SeaKat | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  110. SeaKat: Yeah, I had TMD, but SLV, awesome!

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  111. Jimmy Neutron: Boy Genius

    What Dreams May Come

    Home Alone

    Comment by baby fish mouth | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  112. Down To You

    Comment by baby fish mouth | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  113. Five Easy Pieces

    I think I’m proudest of that one, so far.

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  114. I’m still giggling every time I think of Above the Rim.

    Five Easy Pieces.
    Westward Ho.

    Comment by shu_shu | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  115. Jinx!

    Comment by shu_shu | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  116. Five Easy Pieces is FAB

    I am on the ambien now. Be warned.

    Comment by baby fish mouth | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  117. love actually

    Comment by baby fish mouth | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  118. butch cassidy and the sundance kid

    Comment by baby fish mouth | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  119. Bend it Like Beckham

    Comment by SeaKat | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  120. ha!

    Comment by shu_shu | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  121. shu_shu: I will share credit for it!

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  122. The Longest Yard

    Comment by shu_shu | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  123. She;s the man

    Comment by baby fish mouth | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  124. thanks LTP! 🙂 Great (dirty) minds, ya know…

    Comment by shu_shu | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  125. what a girl wants

    Comment by baby fish mouth | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  126. Magnum Force.

    Comment by shu_shu | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  127. eight crazy nights

    Comment by baby fish mouth | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  128. gorillas in the mist

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  129. 30 days of night

    days of thunder

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  130. i’m giggling at gorillas in the mist because, you know…

    ew.

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  131. Mr. Woodcock

    Comment by baby fish mouth | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  132. for you, bfm:

    when harry met sally

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  133. Every Which Way But Loose

    Comment by shu_shu | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  134. Offbeat (for the dyslexics)

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  135. OOO, good one shu_shu and Anywhich Way You Can

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  136. but with a space

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  137. thank you stm

    Comment by baby fish mouth | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  138. Ten Commandments

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  139. Push

    Comment by baby fish mouth | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  140. hahaha

    All the Right Moves

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  141. The Unsinkable Molly Brown

    Comment by baby fish mouth | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  142. long night’s journey into day

    Comment by baby fish mouth | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  143. The Firm
    The Kid
    The Natural

    Much Ado About Nothing? :}

    Comment by baby fish mouth | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  144. Scrooged

    Comment by baby fish mouth | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  145. ok i am the only one playing now?

    Comment by baby fish mouth | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  146. Must Love Dogs

    Comment by baby fish mouth | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  147. Bones just reminded me, Bone Deep

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  148. Whore and Piece? oops, no that’s not what we;re gouing for here is it. mnaybe it’s m bedtime.

    Comment by baby fish mouth | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  149. bfm: that made me laugh out loud

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  150. Must Love, Dogs, that is

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  151. bfm: No, but worthy of a new thread!

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  152. Dr. T and the Women

    Comment by baby fish mouth | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  153. Napoleon Dynamite

    Comment by baby fish mouth | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  154. joy luck club

    Comment by baby fish mouth | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  155. wild things

    Comment by baby fish mouth | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  156. Deep Impact
    Pee-wee’s Big Adventure
    Big Top Pee Wee
    Freddy Got Fingered
    Howard’s End
    Free Willy

    Comment by KeeblerKahn | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  157. Spaceballs

    Comment by Janet | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  158. The Postman Always Rings Twice

    Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner

    Pretty in Pink

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  159. Lorenzo’s Oil

    Comment by Janet | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  160. Janet, OMG, YES! I was creeped out by that title when it came out in … what? 1994?

    Comment by SeaKat | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  161. And, Keebs –FGF was inspired.

    Comment by SeaKat | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  162. Nurse Betty

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  163. YOJIMBO!!!!

    Comment by bedbugs and ballyhoo | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  164. Idle Hands

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  165. Yay! Seakat!

    From Justin to Kelly.
    Dr. Strangelove (or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb)

    Comment by Janet | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  166. The Hustler

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  167. The Pelican Brief(s).

    Comment by Janet | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  168. Zack and Miri Make a Porno

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  169. Rambo

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  170. HA! Rambo!

    Comment by Janet | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  171. The Last American Virgin

    Comment by Lily the Pink | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  172. Ha! Keebs: I also enjoyed FGF. AND Pee Wee’s Big Adventure. How was that not already named?!?!?!

    PS: bfm…maybe the ambien is kicking in. Which really, in itself, is a whole other thread: Preferred sleep aids. I used to take Lunesta, but it made me feel like I was sucking on dirty socks.

    Comment by shu_shu | May 29, 2009 | Reply

  173. Am I the only one playing now??? Serves me right. I left to go drink red beer and karaoke!

    Comment by shu_shu | May 30, 2009 | Reply

  174. South Park: Bigger, Longer, and Uncut

    Bedtime For Bonzo

    Comment by KeeblerKahn | May 30, 2009 | Reply

  175. Children’s movies:

    Dragon Ball Z
    Pokemon
    Big
    Dick Tracy
    James and the Giant Peach

    Comment by HolyChow | May 30, 2009 | Reply

  176. Virgin Suicides

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 30, 2009 | Reply

  177. Dogtown and Z Boys

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 30, 2009 | Reply

  178. Monster’s Ball!

    Comment by baby fish mouth | May 30, 2009 | Reply

  179. LOL.

    and i don’t “LOL.”

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 30, 2009 | Reply

  180. bfm: that was geeeeenius.

    Comment by SeaKat | May 30, 2009 | Reply

  181. White Chicks

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 30, 2009 | Reply

  182. Die Hard

    Die Harder

    Die Hard with a Vengeance

    Live Free or Die Hard

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 30, 2009 | Reply

  183. It Takes Two

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 30, 2009 | Reply

  184. IRON MAN!!!!!!

    Comment by SeaKat | May 30, 2009 | Reply

  185. Nice SK!

    Also if i didn’t say it before, lorenzo’s oil = awesome

    Comment by baby fish mouth | May 30, 2009 | Reply

  186. i keep cracking up at my friend flicka!

    The Incredible Hulk

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 30, 2009 | Reply

  187. How many do we have now??? This has to be the most exhaustive compilation of accidental-sounding porn ever created!

    Comment by shu_shu | May 30, 2009 | Reply

  188. …and Rule 34 suggests that this will soon be the “dialogue” for a porn flick(a), itself.

    How very meta.

    Comment by SeaKat | May 30, 2009 | Reply

  189. we’re at 182, leaving out duplicates and the littler sperrmmaid (hahahah, hilarious, but not a real movie!!!)

    183: Red Dawn

    Comment by stopthemadness | May 30, 2009 | Reply

  190. BTW, that last comment I wrote was supposed to read:

    porn flick(a) itself.

    As it showed up, it makes no sense. 😛

    Comment by SeaKat | May 30, 2009 | Reply

  191. more Bond:
    Her Majesty’s Secret Service
    Dr. No
    From Russia With Love
    The Spy Who Loved Me

    others:
    Toys
    Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure

    Now we’re at 189.

    Comment by WhoMee | May 31, 2009 | Reply

  192. 190) Officer and a Gentleman (soft porn, perhaps)

    Comment by WhoMee | May 31, 2009 | Reply

  193. 191. Tropic Thunder

    192. Old Yeller

    Comment by HolyChow | May 31, 2009 | Reply

  194. hahaha Dr. No… that would be the one I star in. it’s a very short flick. set in a medical office… i simply reject everyone, then roll credits.

    Comment by baby fish mouth | May 31, 2009 | Reply

  195. Also, to complement Monster’s Ball, the Family Stone. Now there are 2.

    Comment by baby fish mouth | May 31, 2009 | Reply

  196. You’re Invited to Mary Kate & Ashley’s Sleepover Party

    Comment by shu_shu | June 8, 2009 | Reply

  197. AHHHAHAHHA! Shu!!!

    Comment by SeaKat | June 8, 2009 | Reply

  198. 193. Legend

    194. I am Legend

    195. The Omega Man

    196. Men at Work

    197. Uncle Buck

    198. The Secret to My Success

    199. Working Girl

    200. What About Bob?

    Comment by TheHobo | June 8, 2009 | Reply

  199. Lol. Lil’Shu-bert is in the hospital for jaw surgery and they have a list of movies you can check out to watch in your room. MK&A’s naughty fun-time pj party is one of them.

    Comment by shu_shu | June 8, 2009 | Reply

  200. On the topic of Bond movies, I honestly can’t believe no one remembered

    Thunderball.

    And For Your Eyes Only.

    Comment by Pifreak | June 13, 2009 | Reply


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