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Zee Juhmanz, Zey Are Zoh Kinkay

I wonder if it was whitening?

toothpasteGerman police are looking for a nefarious criminal–who was thwarted trying to smuggle 68 tubes of toothpaste out of a supermarket. A store worker noticed his bulging “jacket” and grabbed the man, who refused to stop and spilled his ill gotten gains. Clean-up on Aisle 5! The thief then punched the worker and ran. “We don’t know if he had bad teeth,” a police spokeswoman said. I didn’t make that shit up–and I am in love with that spokeswoman.


April 9, 2009 - Posted by | Criminally Stupid, News You May or May Not Use | , ,


  1. Are you happy to see me, or is it toothpaste that is putting the bulge in your “jacket”?

    Comment by queencrone | April 9, 2009 | Reply

  2. Where in the jacket? Such bad mental images right now…

    Comment by TheHobo | April 9, 2009 | Reply

  3. This “nefarious crime” reminds of an age-old question. Has anyone ever heard/read the word “heinous” used without being immediately followed by the word “crime”?

    Comment by WhoMee | April 9, 2009 | Reply

  4. Didn’t Bill and Ted used to say it?

    Comment by baby fish mouth | April 9, 2009 | Reply

  5. I think I’ve heard/read “heinous” in reference to clothes/hair.

    Yes, it’s true, I am Cher Horowitz.

    Comment by SeaKat | April 9, 2009 | Reply

  6. Her clothes are heinous.
    His hair is heinous.
    She’s heinous!

    Yeah, I suppose those count, but they’re more like colloquialisms. I remember using that last one many times in high school.

    Comment by WhoMee | April 9, 2009 | Reply

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