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Random Drunk Emission

People who love themselves too much Edition

ts-i_love_myself_and_thats_all_that_mattersIt’s ok if you like who you are; in fact it’s awesome. Some people, though–all they seem to talk about is themselves. It doesn’t matter what you are talking about, they will always find a way to make the conversation about how great THEY are. They go on and on until I become suspicious. (I am a naturally paranoid person, so I become suspicious much more quickly than others.)

Why are you telling me how great you are? Why should I care that your house is big and you have pretty hair? Is it important for me to know that you never work out and yet somehow you’re still a size 2?

You’re screwing with me aren’t you?  You’re trying to give me some sort of complex!!! Well screw you, Miss Perfect!  For your information, I already have a complex, so I don’t have time for the one you’re trying to give me.

Now if you’ll excuse, I have to go make sure I locked the front door forty more times before I go to bed.


April 9, 2009 - Posted by | Random Drunk Emissions |


  1. Love it!

    Comment by baby fish mouth | April 9, 2009 | Reply

  2. p.s. Anyone who can eat what they want and stay a size 2 either doesn’t want anything but bean casings, or has a medical problem. See a doctor, skinny pants!

    Comment by baby fish mouth | April 9, 2009 | Reply

  3. …”Enough about me, daahling. What do YOU think about me?!”


    Comment by queencrone | April 9, 2009 | Reply

  4. ha!

    I am learning more and more about personality disorders (sudden hobby of mine) and I believe that one is known as “narcissistic personality disorder.” Run. Run far far away!

    Comment by TheHobo | April 9, 2009 | Reply

  5. I don’t have narcissistic personality disorder. It’s been empirically shown that I’m awesome.

    Comment by WhoMee | April 9, 2009 | Reply

  6. STM you crack me the fuck up!

    Hobo, did you learn about “narcisstic personality disorder” from Billy Bob Thornton?

    Comment by rumour has it | April 9, 2009 | Reply

  7. Uhh…my first instinct was to tell you about a co-worker of mine who is ridiculous about this. Does that mean I am too? Dammit, I’m so confused!

    Comment by Chelsea - PETA Protector | April 9, 2009 | Reply

  8. LOL @ Chelsea.
    I know what you mean!

    DAMMIT, I have it TOO!!

    There I go again! D’oh!

    Comment by SeaKat | April 9, 2009 | Reply

  9. Chelsea and SeaKat, the first step is accepting that you think you’re awesome.

    There are no further steps.

    Comment by WhoMee | April 9, 2009 | Reply

  10. Actually it is Deimos who wrote this. I mistakenly attributed it to me when I uploaded it. So it is Deimos who cracks you the fuck up! As she does all of us.


    Comment by stopthemadness | April 10, 2009 | Reply

  11. Also in this category — people who facebook about losing weight. It almost warrants an automatic “defriend” in my book.

    Comment by shu_shu | April 10, 2009 | Reply

  12. shu – don’t defriend me, i made a facebook status the other day about feeling fat and eating cookies but it was a one-off i promise!

    Comment by baby fish mouth | April 10, 2009 | Reply

  13. Oh, you can facebook about overeating and gaining weight. I’m down with that.

    I’m specifically referencing this one girl who is facebooking her weight loss. Today:

    “So excited that I’ve lost more weight in the last week!! I got pants a size smaller than I did a week ago YAY!”

    ::Blows head off::

    Comment by shu_shu | April 10, 2009 | Reply

  14. That’s awful. I follow Giuliana DePandi (or Rancic) on Twitter and all she does is tweet all day about loving healthy food and hating food that’s bad for you. She’s like Instant Gwyneth… no need to wait for goop when you have twitter.

    Comment by baby fish mouth | April 10, 2009 | Reply

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