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Lowku

Life in 5,7,5

We at Thundersquee! can’t help but be indignant at the inequities of the poetic form when it comes to expressing the more low brow moments in life. So, to help even the field we offer you Lowku. The game and aim are simple. Twice a week we’ll display an image of one of life’s more “WTF?” moments, and your mission is to carefully select words that add up to 17 syllables and string them together in 5,7,5 form in order to describe said image or tell its story.

Each Monday and Wednesday the winners of the previous challenge will be announced and a new image will be posted to ignite the next round of genius.

Here are this round’s winners:


Another strong round, but today two entries really stood out, so it’s a tie for first place, but everyone else took second and there are no losers. I’d name someone Miss Congeniality, but I’m keeping that title for myself, motherfuckers.

Today’s 1st place winners are:

baby fish mouth, for her brilliant tie in with the previous Lowku.

although mary was
now martin, she remembered
her childhood fondly

she and heather spent
every day in heather’s pool
til heather got boobs

mary had exchanged
chubby for a chub
gross, i know, but true


and AdmittedlyAddicted, who turned an already creepy photo into a wonderfully creepy, yet amusing, Lowku tale while managing to use “methamphetamines.”

(from man in tub)

Dear Michael Jackson,
I have always been a fan.
Young, wet and waiting…

(from cat)

Dear Michael Jackson,
He’s always been a fan, and
I’m safe as pussy.

(from M.Jackson)

Thanks for your support.
Waxing chest was a nice touch;
still, too old for me.

P.S. Purple is
nice, but pussy makes me want
methamphetamines.


Honorable Mention, aka 1st Runner Up goes to SeaKat.  If at any time bfm and AdAd aren’t able to perform their duties, SeaKat will be expected to step in. I think having made  a children’s literature pun in a poem about a naked man proves she is ready to do so.

When I read the book,
“Tuck Everlasting” I sure
did not expect this!


Everyone else more than earned themselves a round of applause.  Congrats and great job, everyone.  Here’s today’s image.  Have fun!

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April 1, 2009 - Posted by | Lowku | ,

30 Comments »

  1. Thank you!!! Thank you!

    ::walks out to get award::

    ::slips and becomes unable to perform her duties::

    Comment by baby fish mouth | April 1, 2009 | Reply

  2. Now the question is, should I pretend I didn’t notice as you lie there with scenery falling on you, or should I run to help while muttering about having to get this tiara resized if you and SeaKat have different sized heads? I know, I’ll just do the human thing and be truly concerned and help you up. Besides, we can always use shirt pins to keep the tiara on SeaKat’s head.

    Comment by Lily the Pink | April 1, 2009 | Reply

  3. My STARS!!! Why I’m just so honored and SURPRISED to be given the opportunity to serve as Lowku Princess!

    ::hides banana peel from floor down front of dress::

    Y’all, I’ve got my pageant hairdo all set! We can just use AquaNet to glue the tiara on!!

    Comment by SeaKat | April 1, 2009 | Reply

  4. Sad cabana boy
    can’t understand, since she thought
    it funny last night

    Giddy-up, horsie!
    Likely to be cropped
    in photo album

    Fountain horse wishes
    for more water pressure to
    Wash away the shame

    Yeah, it’s a slow work day.

    Comment by Roxydarling | April 1, 2009 | Reply

  5. thank ya, thank ya. That was the most disturbing lowku I ever had to write… 🙂 haha! WORTH IT….

    Here’s my new one:

    Another lame spoof
    movie ramps up action with
    methamphetamines…

    Dumb and Dumber 2:
    Wedding Crashers,filming now
    at weddings near you!

    Comment by AdmittedlyAddicted | April 1, 2009 | Reply

  6. smile for the camera
    ignore cousin Mike he’s on
    methamphetamines

    Comment by silent noodles | April 1, 2009 | Reply

  7. Who’s going to ride
    your white horses? Oh, no wait
    It’s that gimp right there

    Comment by Chris Jones | April 1, 2009 | Reply

  8. I think smile might be 2 syllables…

    Comment by silent noodles | April 1, 2009 | Reply

  9. Giddy up nelly!
    We have to ride off and find
    Where my pants have gone!

    Comment by Chris Jones | April 1, 2009 | Reply

  10. Drunks at a wedding.
    Can there be a better thing?
    I suspect there can

    Comment by Chris Jones | April 1, 2009 | Reply

  11. A cock on a horse.
    On a horse a cock of course.
    It couldn’t be worse.

    Comment by Chris Jones | April 1, 2009 | Reply

  12. silent, I have this problem all the time because down south we say things all jacked up.

    I’m pretty sure I can vouch for you and say at some point in my life, I’ve definitely said smile instead of smi-el.

    Comment by AdmittedlyAddicted | April 1, 2009 | Reply

  13. besides, if that isn’t a redneck southern boy (Cousin Billy Ray) gone nuts (drunk) in paradise (at the cousin who married up’s wedding)…I don’t know what it is.

    Comment by AdmittedlyAddicted | April 1, 2009 | Reply

  14. Adad, that last comment may not have been a haiku, but it sure was poety.

    “Cousin who married up’s wedding” — LOL

    Comment by SeaKat | April 1, 2009 | Reply

  15. I’m too busy laughing, first at the winners from last week, then the picture, then the crown thing…oh wow. I ❤ you guys!

    No, really, I heart you guys. The way I heart NY…

    Comment by TheHobo | April 1, 2009 | Reply

  16. Look, what you don’t get
    Is this is a posed photo;
    They want his bare ass.

    Comment by TheHobo | April 1, 2009 | Reply

  17. This is MY big day.

    But who knew I’d be upstaged

    By Catherine The Great

    Comment by queencrone | April 1, 2009 | Reply

  18. Oh, bareback riding
    Is that a good idea?
    and while in public?

    Comment by Chris Jones | April 1, 2009 | Reply

  19. I hope that after
    dismounting from that fine steed
    that it’s not dappled

    Comment by Chris Jones | April 1, 2009 | Reply

  20. Misunderstanding?
    I said hung like a horse, fool
    not hung with a horse!

    Comment by Chris Jones | April 1, 2009 | Reply

  21. I want ride off
    and so not spoil your photo
    but my horse is fake

    Comment by Chris Jones | April 1, 2009 | Reply

  22. “Do you take this horse,
    To be your lawfully wed
    companion?”, “yee haw!”

    Comment by Chris Jones | April 1, 2009 | Reply

  23. I hope you keep these in a notebook somewhere, Chris Jones. This is show-your-grandchildren type shit right here.

    Comment by baby fish mouth | April 1, 2009 | Reply

  24. Or better yet:

    Hope you save these, Chris.
    This is show-your-grandchildren
    type shit right here, homes.

    Comment by Helen Skor | April 1, 2009 | Reply

  25. Go ahead and be
    a pretty pretty princess.
    I’m the Lone Ranger.

    Comment by TheHobo | April 1, 2009 | Reply

  26. Now where I come from
    Smile has just one syllable
    and camera three.

    Comment by BunchOfFives | April 1, 2009 | Reply

  27. Baby/Helen: save schmave… The Internet never forgets 🙂

    Comment by Chris Jones | April 2, 2009 | Reply

  28. Hobo, speaking of hearting places (such as NY):

    My brother-in-law went to DC for work, and when he came back he brought my son and I a t-shirt…which was extremely nice of him. Anyway, he got me one that says “I *heart* DC”. So, it’s a weekend, and I have nothing to slum in, so I pull out that shirt and decide to sport it for the day.

    My husband and his best friend ragged on me all day about how my shirt said “I love dick.”

    Comment by AdmittedlyAddicted | April 2, 2009 | Reply

  29. AdAd, around here, those shirts mean one of two things: 1) you are a tourist, or 2) you got too drunk at happy hour, puked on yourself, and have now resorted to a $3 shirt so that the cab driver will take you home.

    Comment by Helen Skor | April 2, 2009 | Reply

  30. HAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA! It’s my, I have to work in the yard OR clean my house today and since I’m miserable I’m wearing miserable clothes, shirt…but, er, don’t tell my sister I said that.

    Comment by AdmittedlyAddicted | April 3, 2009 | Reply


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