uncollectedminds

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Ms. Roboto, If You’re Nasty

We can rebuild her, shorter, metalier, scowlier.

ts-fashionrobotGet ready to nerdgasm, people, brought to you by the Japanese (no doi!). The National Institute of Advanced Industrial Science and Technology has created a robotic model, much to the chagrin of 15-year-old, eastern-block beauties. The HRP-4C is a battery-powered, 5′ 2″ metal momma with a realistic face.

The news of her upcoming fashion debut on March 23 has already taken a toll, however. HRC-4C was forced to lose 33 pounds. Clearly, she used to be a fatty – I mean have you seen an extra 33 pounds on 5’2″ woman? Lard-o! She is now a svelte 95 pounds.

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March 18, 2009 - Posted by | News You May or May Not Use | , ,

34 Comments »

  1. How many men are looking at that right now and thinking *this will revolutionize the blowup doll industry.*

    Comment by baby fish mouth | March 18, 2009 | Reply

  2. “Much to the chagrin of 15-year-old, eastern-block beauties.” made me pee a little.

    Comment by oneofthevoicesinmyhead | March 18, 2009 | Reply

  3. I bet she gives good head.

    Comment by judy | March 18, 2009 | Reply

  4. Now Asimo has someone to clean his tool.

    Comment by WhoMee | March 18, 2009 | Reply

  5. Don’t we need jobs? For real life people? I know in most cases models aren’t considered people but for this argument, they are. Give people their jobs back!!! And while we’re at it, bring back phone operators. If I have to yell at one more recording because they did not understand my response… so help me God!!

    Comment by Chronically Constipated | March 18, 2009 | Reply

  6. Yeah and bring back phone sex operators too. I’m tired of having to type out everything I want Microsoft Mary to read in a dirty voice.

    Comment by baby fish mouth | March 18, 2009 | Reply

  7. bfm, that reminds me of this:

    http://www.comedycentral.com/videos/index.jhtml?videoId=78925&title=phone-sex-for-the-deaf

    Comment by DonnaMartin | March 18, 2009 | Reply

  8. OK, the yelling in Chinese made that whole thing worth watching…

    Comment by baby fish mouth | March 18, 2009 | Reply

  9. ANTM Cycle 2143. How do you say “Damn, that bitch can smile with her eyes!” in Japanese?

    Comment by shu_shu | March 18, 2009 | Reply

  10. I don’t know how to say it in Japanese, shu_shu, but in HRC-4C’s native language it’s:

    00011000101010001000100010010001000100100010 !

    Comment by SeaKat | March 18, 2009 | Reply

  11. SeaKat for the win.

    Also, when robotic women have to lose weight we’re all in trouble.

    Does this metal make my ass look big?

    Comment by TheHobo | March 18, 2009 | Reply

  12. HA!! I agree. Seakat FTW!!!! That was great!

    Comment by shu_shu | March 19, 2009 | Reply

  13. So, yeah, I kind of hate myself right now because I laughed at SeaKat’s joke and thought “Good one!” Then I thought, “Except that’s not nearly enough digits and not a multiple of 8 bit bytes long.” I’m available for parties, folks!

    Comment by oneofthevoicesinmyhead | March 19, 2009 | Reply

  14. Leaving off the last 4 bits, here’s what SeaKat wrote:
    ¨ˆ‘

    Dunno about you, but that kinda looks R2D2-ish to me. It could quite easily mean what shu_shu wrote.

    Comment by WhoMee | March 19, 2009 | Reply

  15. nerds!!!

    ::points fingers::

    Comment by DonnaMartin | March 19, 2009 | Reply

  16. WhoMee

    Comment by WhoMee | March 19, 2009 | Reply

  17. Oops, that was supposed to be:

    WhoMee

    Comment by WhoMee | March 19, 2009 | Reply

  18. *sigh* didn’t work

    Comment by WhoMee | March 19, 2009 | Reply

  19. WhoMee: And clearly what she meant to say was:

    “01000100 01100001 01101101 01101110 00101100 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100001 01110100 00100000 01100010 01101001 01110100 01100011 01101000 00100000 01100011 01100001 01101110 00100000 01110011 01101101 01101001 01101100 01100101 00100000 01110111 01101001 01110100 01101000 00100000 01101000 01100101 01110010 00100000 01100101 01111001 01100101 01110011 00100001”

    Comment by oneofthevoicesinmyhead | March 19, 2009 | Reply

  20. 01110111 01100101 01101100 01101100 00100000 01100100 01101111 01101110 01100101 00101100 00100000 01101111 01101111 01110100 01110110 01101001 01101101 01101000 00100001

    Comment by WhoMee | March 19, 2009 | Reply

  21. LANGUAGE, people!! Language!

    Comment by baby fish mouth | March 19, 2009 | Reply

  22. LOL

    Comment by WhoMee | March 19, 2009 | Reply

  23. OMG.

    You guys are right. I’m a binary code poseur. I had hoped to fake it a bit longer, but ::sob!!::

    Can you ever forgive me?

    ::Lifts tear-stained face delicately lit by spear of sunlight from above, as though by the hand of God, himself::

    Comment by SeaKat | March 19, 2009 | Reply

  24. HAHAH!!! Okay, so I had to use a binary code translator, but it was worth it!!!!

    Comment by shu_shu | March 19, 2009 | Reply

  25. SeaKat, if that’s your clever way of getting out of STM pointing her Geek Judgment finger at you… well all I can say is, I am impressed. That was an elaborate plot and I wish I could plan that well.

    Shu… I didn’t even think to look it up. Oh my god it’s brilliant that they actually did that. I am going to try:

    0100001001110101011100110110100101101110011001010111001101110011

    Comment by baby fish mouth | March 19, 2009 | Reply

  26. Oh, whoops, it was DonnaMartin pointing geek fingers. Either way, there is pointage.

    Comment by baby fish mouth | March 19, 2009 | Reply

  27. Although I would like to point out that WhooMee’s initial translation of my post actually looks a bit like 2 eyes with some weird Mr. Jay Manuel makeupery in between… So, it *could* be a picture of our metal model smiling with her eyes.

    ::sigh::

    Models are so literal.

    😛

    Comment by SeaKat | March 19, 2009 | Reply

  28. WhoMee: Ha ha, thank you!

    Comment by Lily the Pink | March 19, 2009 | Reply

  29. bfm: business?

    Comment by Lily the Pink | March 19, 2009 | Reply

  30. SeaKat: It was good joke! That I’m too much of a pedantic geek to allow myself to fully enjoy it is just one of those things. And by “is just one of those things I mean “paid for my therapist’s Porsche.” 🙂

    Comment by Lily the Pink | March 19, 2009 | Reply

  31. Lily, It’s all good.

    Why, yes, I DO sometimes channel Matthew (T-Rex) McConaughey. You should see my naked bongo playing.

    BTW, I only **just now** noticed that “Bongo” is “bong” plus an “o”. I guess now we know why that’s T-Rex’s instrument of choice.)

    Comment by SeaKat | March 19, 2009 | Reply

  32. That’s right lily. BUSINESS.

    Comment by baby fish mouth | March 20, 2009 | Reply

  33. this blog is fraught with nerds and geeks.

    i love it.

    Comment by DonnaMartin | March 23, 2009 | Reply

  34. anyone see the battlestar galactica season finale.

    robots, y’all. ROBOTS.

    Comment by DonnaMartin | March 23, 2009 | Reply


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