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Time Rewind

Trapper Keeper Edition

2280294835_07ba9cd220This edition is all about, The Trapper Keeper. I had a few in my time and now they are back, new and improved. The only things I hated about the Trapper Keeper were that the rings always broke and it didn’t hold very many papers. It promised it would, but much like Carlos Jackson who checked the “yes” box on my boyfriend request and checked Tara what’s her names  “yes” box too, Trapper Keeper LIED! LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIED! And also like the betrayal of Carlos and Tara, I handled the loss by listening to a lot of Air Supply and Journey.

Now that I think about it, I lost my shit a lot because of those damned things. The ads said they’d trap your papers,but in fact they did the very opposite of trapping–they regurgitated them. But what could I do? Much like leg warmers and Jordache, you sucked if you didn’t have one.

I still have fond memories of all my trapper keepers, though. My favorite was the one with the trippy unicorn scene. I always felt high when I would stare at it too long. I raise my jello pop and beer to you. It’s not an ideal combo, but it’s what I could find in the freezer. Cheers to you, Trapper Keeper. May you continue to screw over little kids by losing their damned homework.

Video after the jump!

August 7, 2009 - Posted by | Culture Critic | ,

19 Comments »

  1. ALIENS RANSACKED MY ROOM!

    Comment by Sarah | August 7, 2009 | Reply

  2. Ahhhhh, the smell of plastic surrounding your paperwork. My velcro always wore out and that would be the start of the untrapping.

    Am I strange that i got excited to go school supply shopping with my daughter?

    Comment by payter | August 7, 2009 | Reply

  3. Yeah, and then there was Mead 5-Star. Totally pwnd Trapper Keeper.

    Comment by TheHobo | August 7, 2009 | Reply

  4. You never forget the original. But sometimes the original stinks which is why they invented, new and improved.

    Comment by cookiebees | August 7, 2009 | Reply

  5. I remember the girl down the street stole my trapper keeper! I was totally going to cut that ho but then she moved…ah yes sweet violent memories.

    Comment by silent noodles | August 7, 2009 | Reply

  6. All I ever wanted was a trapper keeper. A teal one. When I finally got one (NOT TEAL) it didn’t hold my stuff. I was a bookworm – its measly velcro strip was no match for my wild piles of papers and crap. I could barely shove my steno in there without everything coming undone.

    Then one day in the 7th grade my Granny bought me a Mead 5 Star. It was teal – the color of coolness and superiority. She suggested I should try writing for fun. I did and I filled that sucker all the way up. Trapper Keeper was a hot fling, but it couldn’t change my life the way Mead did.

    (Fin)

    Comment by baby fish mouth | August 7, 2009 | Reply

  7. i think i’ve just been paralyzed with memories.

    Comment by lava | August 7, 2009 | Reply

  8. I had a purple TK that had a pegasus standing on a mountain on the cover. It was so cool. I gotta say, I really felt like I was hot shit.

    I also had a pair of red legwarmers that my dad inadvertantly washed with the whites. All the sheets and underware were pink. It must have been 10 years before my mom trusted him to do laundry

    Comment by blah | August 8, 2009 | Reply

  9. Blah, you have almost achieved the 80’s trifecta of coolness. Were these leg warmers worn with any jordache, calvin klein, or gloria vanderbilt, jeans? Chic and Palmetto do not count. They were the bastard jeans. I’m still on the fence with Sergio Valente jeans.

    Comment by cookiebees | August 8, 2009 | Reply

  10. cookiebees – YES! My mom always got us chic jeans because we couldn’t afford the designer jeans – and she didn’t understand why they weren’t as good. “But they look the same! Look at the fancy stitching on the back pocket!” Actually, she probably understood just fine, but couldn’t do much about it.

    Also – we always had plenty of food to eat, a warm, safe house and a good education. Just not a ton of extras.

    I *did* however, have a teal blue Trapper Keeper! Booo Yah!

    Oh, and my aunt took me to buy deck shoes in 6th grade when those were the coolest. So I had it goin’ on. ;)

    Comment by SeaKat | August 8, 2009 | Reply

  11. We were too po’ to afford designer stuff. I remember desperately wanting a pair of Keds, but settling for an off-brand and a blue magic marker.

    Comment by shu_shu | August 8, 2009 | Reply

  12. shu – ha! Isn’t it sad the things we STILL remember wanting so badly?

    I’ve promised myself that, if we can, I’ll let the Sea Cannibal get ONE important “status” item when she’s at the age where that becomes really important. I mean, if she were in Jr. High right now and really, really, really HAD to have a pair of designer jeans…I’d probably throw up a little at the price but would do it. Just ’cause I couldn’t when I was younger.

    I’ve read that, as long as you aren’t induling in every little fad and as long as you’re not endangering your family’s financial health to do it – that it’s actually not a bad thing to let your child have one or two of those “OMG-I-MUST-HAVE-IT” items at that age. Something about peer acceptence.

    Comment by SeaKat | August 8, 2009 | Reply

  13. Jordache! Oh shite! I had the jeans with the zippers at the ankles and the jacket to match.
    I saved all my money to buy the bow outfit.
    Am I showing my age?

    Comment by bedbugs and ballyhoo | August 8, 2009 | Reply

  14. SK I know! And that was when I was very young — like 7.

    I’m actually thankful that when I was a teenager, it was all about Lillith Fair and grunge. I wore long hippie dresses, overalls and Birkenstocks and listened to bluegrass and old country.

    But I do agree — I’m OK with one or two ZOMG status items, but just as long as that status isn’t “Real Housewives of New Jersey casting call.”

    Comment by shu_shu | August 8, 2009 | Reply

  15. I made the transition from Trapper Keeper to Mead 5-star first gear in middle school. I did love those random silver shapes in a kaleidoscope background.

    I remember faded torn jeans, My Pearl Jam T-Shirt proclaiming 8 out of 10 kids prefered crayons to guns, thrift store flannel shirts and Doc Martin boots and hating yuppies. I know own striped polo shirts and Ikea furniture…I sold out.

    Comment by drgnsldr | August 8, 2009 | Reply

  16. Wow, I’M SO OLD. I was a sophomore or junior in college when grunge hit!!!

    God, when I was about 9 or 10 I remember desperately wanting clogs and a pair of knickers. I never got them, because (say it with me!!!) we didn’t have no money.

    Sometimes, being po’ is a blessing in disguise.

    Comment by SeaKat | August 8, 2009 | Reply

  17. Amen, SeaKat. Well said.

    Comment by baby fish mouth | August 9, 2009 | Reply

  18. My mom actually was the one trying to get me to wear designer stuff. I was totally out of it. Her and my dad both kept trying to get me into girly outfits and jewelry, and my mom bought me make up and tried to get me to wear it.

    What I wanted, and wasn’t allowed to do, was go play with the boys, namely, my brother and his friends. Which, granted, I’m sure he didn’t like the idea either, but I ended up spending a lot of time in my respective ultra-girly bedrooms. At mom’s I had a white heart daybed with “rose and bashful” coloring over the walls. At dad’s I had a purple Pegasus/unicorn canopy bed. At both I had more stuffed animals than most kids would know what to do with.

    On the upside, I read a lot as a child. Usually curled up in bed with a stuffed animal…

    Comment by TheHobo | August 10, 2009 | Reply

  19. Trapper Keepers never get old.

    Comment by jujubees | January 18, 2010 | Reply


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